On Depression

(and how I’m getting over it)

I’ve been experiencing random impulses of depression lately, perhaps a part of what’s diagnosed as mood swings and mood disorders. While I can not decide precisely what’s going wrong I’m trying to do my best to overcome it. I’m sharing my experience here.

I know so many literature descriptive anthology pieces about depression, however, I really like al-Ghazali’s:Abū Ḥāmid al-Ghazali, Jamīl Ṣalībā (ed), and Kamel Ali, Deliverance from error (Beirut, Lebanon: Dar al-Andalus, 2002), 135.

There’s always something different in 1st millennium depression literature (check out Foucault’s “History of Insanity”), perhaps it’s the most non-casual (at least not from an intellectual perspective) form of depression ever recorded.

al-Ghazali depicted later what helped him survive this state, which was basically Sufism Read the Sufism chapter of his book if you are interested in more details. Also check: Why a Sufi approach to healing mental illness is so powerful . I think that this approach might not be very helpful. Not specifically Sufism, but intellectual changes generally.

As I mentioned my depression was (is?) swinging, I got the feeling of “I’m alright now, that was it, it’s overcame” many times before suffering a next wave.

The latest “solution” I’ve reached so far is routine, and I know that the recipe I’m going to put now is battle-tested because I’ve tried it when I was and was not in depression, that is; not just keeping self busy but with a purpose to get to the next level.

What I’ve been doing for example is setting a list of activities to do. I’ve a very (very) long bucket list myself, so it is not really about lacking organization but doing something at all. The list should be something doable, easy and not critical, most importantly it should be insulated from anything you would have in a normal to-do-list (i.e. do not add stuff related to you work, study or whatever). I believe it should be crowded as well but not too much. The mere purpose is to keep yourself busy, apparently one of the most naive advice for depression is the one that seems to work. The tasks need to be productive, do not add - play a a video game or whatever. Do things that next morning you will feel good about the fact you have done them.

When I get up feeling depressed and awful, I push myself into the list, emulating to myself that only after finishing this item, this pain is going to vanish, and before I even try harder I’d be occupied in getting the first item of the list done. Once I’m done with it I reproduce with the next item list, and so on. By end of the day if I’m not feeling better already for all the things I’d have done, I know for certain that I will feel great the next day and I will have a severe desire to go into the same action list just like the day before.

The trade-off here is: 1. You can develop the routine however of your state, if you feel so good today you do it and if you do not you do it. 2. It produces something, so even if it does not help healing, at least you are getting things done (I say productive and depressed is better than unproductive and depressed).

• [2024-02-11 Sun 05:38] I think this method still works fine after all these months, perhaps the only thing to focus on more is crisis management.
• [2024-04-04 Thu 15:34] Well for the most part now I can confirm that this works, empirically.
• [2024-08-05 Mon 23:08] I didn’t mention that if you’re suffering from some kind of clinical depression (major depressive disorder) you should seek professional help. I thought that was too obvious.